I Truly Hate Scousers

Did I miss a meeting or something? I am fully aware that the modern-day professional footballer is an overpaid, pampered baby with no true life experience, sense of reality or code of ethics, but when did integrity go out of the window? What happened to the competitive spirit, the endless desire for victory? Since when did bitterness rule the land?

Last night I went to the bar to drink watery, cheap lager, eat diarrhea-inducing chicken wings and watch the Chelsea-Liverpool game. If you are unaware, prior to this game Chelsea held a 1 point lead over United at the top of the table with 2 games left. A win against Liverpool would leave Chelsea only needing to beat Wigan on the final day of the season to win the league. Even if we won all our remaining games, there would be nothing we could do to stop them.

Liverpool hate United. United hate Liverpool. Liverpool have won 18 league titles. United have won 18 league titles.

For a team with no future and certainly no present, the past is all that a team like Liverpool has left. It cannot be easy to let go of former glories. To have United win more league titles than them (and this, believe me, is inevitable) would leave Scousers across Merseyside crying into their bins.

However, fear of losing their one stronghold over United is simply not an excuse to bend over and let 11 Chelsea rent-boys run a train on them is it? Don't they want more credibility than that?

The Liverpool fans hung a banner at Anfield declaring themselves 'Cockney 4 a Day', essentially conceding that they wish their own team to lose in order to prevent United winning the League. That's disgusting. Nobody at United would ever expect a favour from Liverpool, just that they'd do their job. I never genuinely believed that the fans would want to lose.

Steven Gerrard is a cheat and I will say no more on the matter.

What really bends my head though, is that the 40,000+ Scousers that were stuffed into Anfield yesterday had paid good money for their tickets. It's not cheap to go to a Premier League game, and those fans would have been out robbing DVD players, nicking stuff from bins and defrauding the benefits system for weeks in order to go to the Chelsea game. And all to watch their team lose.

United have to beat Stoke next weekend and hope that Wigan do a job on Chelsea. I'm not giving up hope yet.

But if we don't win it this year, then we fucking will next year. And I can't wait for the next time we meet Liverpool at Anfield after that so we can shove all 19 titles down their cheating, Scouse throats.

Same old Scousers. Always cheating.

Love, Smithy x


Postman said...

I meant "offensive" as a compliment.

Jeez, to what depths will the Liverpudlians stoop? I mean, I may have rooted for New Orleans during the Super Bowl, simply because I didn't want Indianapolis to win, but I sure as hell would never have wanted San Diego to lose. That's the basest kind of apostasy I can think of.

Have I mentioned how much I adore these football rants of yours? Truly enjoyable. Lovably brusque. Refreshingly excoriating. Intriguingly esoteric (there are times when I have NO effing idea what you're on about - Wikipedia is my friend). Keep 'em coming. I won't go as far as to say "Go Manchester" (for fear of becoming an apostate myself) but I will say good luck...

Anonymous said...

Gerrrard has done that weak backpass many times, its his forte shall we say. As for wnating man ure not to win, of course, that goes without saying, but cheating, come on. History has shown that given the choice, we would take a win over letting you lose the league. Lets be clear, your time has no class, fergie has shown this numerous times when he has fielded weak teams regardless of the consequences to others. The truth is chelsea were top and we are like 19th, in what world should that mean that we should win? we have been crap all season, take solace in that. As for losing the championship, you did that when chelsea beat you, ow wait,was that a conspiracy also?

Anonymous said...

Oh and by the way, the line about robbing is a bit outdated, check your stats, you are more likely to get robbed in manchester now than liverpool, not that stats will get in the way of your misplaced but still highly comical hatred i know, but just wanted to show you. Remember, you still have the theater of dreams, hahaha, man, can't believe you actually put that on the fucking stadium, what else, do you have, the showers of destiny, the trophy cabinet of thor? Anway love the blog, love the banter, but come on, you can do better than cheating, thieving scouser jokes, cant you?

Griff said...

"Lets be clear, your time has no class, fergie has shown this numerous times when he has fielded weak teams regardless of the consequences to others."

No class, weak teams...but still right up there one point away from top spot!

Liverpools classless pathetic excuse of a sunday league team aren't even where they deserve to be, keep going until you get down to league 2 you scum bags!

And we can do better than cheating, thieving scouser jokes, there's just no point this season as they would be merely wasted on a wound-licking, self-pittied down beat pile of crap that you are this season.

Worry not smithy, I've got your back lad.

Anonymous said...

"Liverpools classless pathetic excuse of a sunday league team aren't even where they deserve to be, keep going until you get down to league 2 you scum bags!"

like i said, classy.

Smithy said...

Was the banner classy? That was my main point really. If any United fan, whatever the circumstances, turned up at the justifiably named Theatre (Theater? Are you American? Or stupid?) of Dreams with a banner declaring they want the other team to lose, I can't see it going down too well.
If there is ever a time that I don't find dirty, thieving Scouser jokes funny, you might as well kill me because I'll be already dead.
Anyway, I truly believe that United have class. I believe that we are competitive but on the fair side of cheating. I believe that we are able to hold our hands up when we've been beaten fairly. And maybe, just maybe, I was wrong to call Gerrard a cheat (although a rumour that I heard today about him getting a 16-year-old Scouse chick pregnant might make me right within another context).
The main gist of my argument was the banner and the disgusting attitude of many Liverpool fans that I've spoken to. Their 'season was over' apparently and 'better that lot win it than man ure'. Liverpools season wasn't over, their was still a feasible mathematical chance of getting 4th spot and if you give up on an opportunity like that, no matter how slim, in favour of getting one over on another team you're not challenging with, then priorities need to be changed, in my view. And priorities soon will be changed at Anfield.
Cos you'll soon be in the League One play-offs.
Thanks for stopping by, Anonymous. Maybe post your name next time like a big boy.

Anonymous said...

Yes, we threw our chance of getting 4th just to let you guys lose, jesus, that is just as stupid as believing the whole gerrard thing, maybe all stories in the newspapers are true? The truth is, we as fans are passionate, and sometime this is shown in ways meant to be seen as humourous, like the banner, the fact that you lot don't have one and actually believe we would want to lose, ever, is well, more of a reflection of yourselves. One banner, what about the other thousands of fans cheering on the team, and as you watched it i know you would have heard them, but whats a little truth when it gets in the way of blame? Lets face it, if we had won 6-0 you still would not have thanked us, and then laughed in our faces when you won, and called us thieves. The truth is, chelsea should have had the league wrapped up weeks ago, and only through them fucking up did you get back in with a chance. Of course, its not the defeats or draws this season that lost you the league, its the little icky scousers with their meany weeny banners. Champions for three seasons in a row and this is how you react, like i said, classy

as for names, its john, how is that any 'bigger' than signing off anonymous or even smithy?

Smithy said...

{Affects Scouse accent}
Eh! Eh! Calm down, calm down!
Not once have I blamed the banner on us not winning the league. not once have I blamed Liverpool or Liverpool fans for us not winning the league.
I've spoken to 2 Liverpool fans who have said they would prefer losing to Chelsea than United winning the League. They weren't joking, they were serious.
I read a forum on 606 where many Liverpool fans were saying the exact same thing.
I think you are getting a little confused, John. I think the banner was embarrassing for you, that's all. I agree that we'd have been out of the running long ago but for Chelsea's fuck-ups, which is why I'm still holding out hope for Sunday.
Anyway, what's your view? Would you have rather won that game against Chelsea, meaning it would have left us only needing to beat Stoke to win the League, beating your record in the process?

Anonymous said...

sorry, love the banter mate. To be honest, it was a no win situation for us, either way we were fucked, but everyone i know, family and friends, many of whom are and have been season ticket holders for more than they would care to admit, wanted us to beat chelsea. Of course there are people, friends when drunk or people online who say they wanted to lose, but in truth they don't or they shouldn't anyway, and are in fact just living up to the sterotypical image of us hating you lot. Of course there is still a lot of ill-feeling, as has been shown here to be honest with the scum comments,etc, but i've never bought into it and i know a lot who don't either. We have enough to worry about without worrying about what you lot are up to. You will beat us in championships, that much is certain, of course as for european cups, well that could be another matter. Anyway, come on, we have a tradition of making banners with stuff like that on it, they are what they are, just opportunities to make fun, and you are right, they did say more about us, but not in the cheating way you think, but in the sense that there was nothing we could do except laugh about the situation. Believe me, like yourself i am sure, what we say about our own teams hurts way more than what anyone else says.
Finally, and this is in no way meant to start things up again, i have to say the thieving scum crap did do my head in. Considering how close people from both places are, it's, well i will be diplomatic, and say disappointing.
Anyway (adopting a liam drawl) r kid, love the banter, a lot of my mates are mancs and its always good to partake in a little jousting.