Welcome to your weekly dose of news, brought to you from a tiny office in a noisy school in central Seoul.

The iPad is here and with it the inevitable iNeed propaganda from Apple. Man, I want one so bad. I didn't think I would, but I do. Maybe I'm just a sucker for Apple marketing. I lay in bed at night watching those little videos on the Apple website. I honestly believe that my life would be improved if I went out and spend the $500 on one. But I suppose that's the nature of capitalism. I sometimes like to paint myself as anti-capitalist but when it comes down to it, I esentially read No Logo once and that's it. That's the top and tail of it. I like to have stuff as much as the next guy. And I'll be buying a 2nd generation iPad. The 1st generation isn't quite up to scratch.

To top off a rough week on the oceans for South Korea after the explosion of a naval ship near the border with North Korea, they had an oil tanker with a $100m cargo hijacked by Somali pirates yesterday. Nightmare. Apparently, due to the nature of the cargo it would be unsafe to attempt to take the ship by force, so it looks like there will be a ransom paid by the American owners of the cargo who were using the Korean ship to transport it back from Iraq. I say good. Get the ransom paid asap. Get the Korean-Filipino crew home safely. And make the American Government pay over the odds for the oil they are pillaging during an illegal, bloody war.

I saw an item on the news last night about Richard Branson's Virgin Galactic program and how they'll be starting testing soon. $200,000 a ticket? I'd pay it if I had it. I wouldn't be on the first flight though like Branson's kids are. Or the second. Or the third for that matter. In fact, I think I'd wait until the fifth flight and it's been proven that you can't just float off into nothingness before I trusted Mr Branson with my life. And then I'd pay the 200 grand. That I don't have.

A Japanese man has been executed in China for smuggling 'stimulant drugs'. What are 'stimulant drugs'? Who wants to buy 'stimulant drugs' in Japan? Strange. And, once again, the tricky issue of the death penalty is being debated the world over. The Chinese are certainly not alone in their use of it, but they are suspected by Amnesty International of executing thousands of people every year. And not even for violent crimes. How does a drug dealer receive a state execution? How does anyone? My personal view is that a state has never got the right to inflict death on a person, no matter what they have done. I don't think a state can ever inflict that sort of violence on another individual and then realistically expect the society which it governs to behave in any other way than violently. I believe that capital punishment is barbaric and antiquated and that, one day soon, we will look back with shame and wonder how it was ever part of the constitution of 'civilised' countries like China and the United States. At least I hope so.

And, in other news, Mr Wonderful has told me to go fuck myself. You're a sensitive boy, aren't you Mr Wonderful? Choosing to ignore the multiple compliments I bestowed on you and throwing your toys out of the pram because I called you sad?

Do you want a cuddle, Mr Wonderful?

Love, Smithy x


Mr. Wonderful said...

Limey cocksucker!

chris said...

Yeah, let's make those nasty rich yanks give all their cash to those plucky Robin Hoods of the sea the Somali Pirates. Corporate America, George Bush blah blah blah blah.

Postman said...

Okay, could we just for once break the mold here and NOT make Corporate America out to be the big bad money-grubbing scum-sucking pile of greedy child-eating old bastards everyone says it is?

Those Somali pirates need to be lined up against a wall and shot. I'm all for getting the South Koreans and Filipinos home safe, though.